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How About Now?

Updated: Jan 26

Very grateful to the practice of slacklining that always seems to take me to the most beautiful places within my Soul…


As I soften inside my heart - I sense a place of knowing. 

“Let the fear die” is what I hear.

I feel a paradigm shift inside the Soul - I trust that all is working in perfect order, relative to my process. It is time for a change, though. 

Addiction has been running the show - Coffee, cannabis, and alcohol - the holy trinity of our time. And what does addiction mean anyways? - addicere Latin in origin, meaning “condition of being dedicated or devoted to something, to speak to, or be enslaved to” - the way I see and experience it, when we are addicted to something, we are giving our power and sovereignty away to that thing, which is often times outside of ourselves,  more than what’s inside. - I’ve come to notice balance and moderation are key, along with an honest look at how I relate to that thing (coffee, cannabis, alcohol, sex, food, exercise, puppies….wait, what?) and why I am engaging with it. 

I feel so intimately connected to the collective, although these patterns are stuck in some other timeline, like the energy I am tapping into is running on a loop. Perhaps this is a true reflection of a greater part of humanity at this time. I will be honest though, I am hearing a call for us to stop engaging with coffee; something about waking up and we are already awake. I have come to know in my own journey with coffee, cannabis, and alcohol that each serves a purpose, and can be tools for growth. How beautiful. The issue right now is that these tools are out of balance, perhaps even out of control. I receive teachings from my ancestors, and can feel into the generational lineage across time and space. I feel it in my own bloodline, and am reminded that part of my job here right now is healing addiction, or at least balancing it out. 


Just the other day when reflecting on coffee, cannabis, and alcohol, I heard “The mind, the body, and the Spirit” - these 3D tools are physical representations of the energies held within and in connection to the mind, body, and spirit, and they are not needed at this time (again this may only apply to a certain population of light who are more awake than others, or just for those of us who are healing addiction specifically). 


First of all, if you see yourself toggling between any of these substances, great observation. It took me some time to notice the subtle patterns between these three things, and how I would pivot between them in order to balance out. I know the answer is simple - just stop. I’m manifesting this hell for myself - and why? Perhaps this is my nervous system healing; a program that was wired in me really young so the neural pathways are deeply ingrained. Regardless, all I can say is as of today and right now, nothing feels more painful than not changing.  


Without a doubt, part of my journey Here in this space and time is to heal addiction - to heal that urge of reaching outside of my self for something to fill me up, make me feel whole. I am whole. You are whole - even if you or I don’t feel it right now, or all the time. There is no separation, there are just perceptions and subjective stories.  And on the journey of feeling into the shadows, we learn compassion for our blind spots. We take responsibility and take steps each day to do better. 


I am by no means an expert. I fall often these days; humbly bow to the practice.  

Here’s what I’ve learned so far as guiding forces in my Becoming You-man practice, (thank you, Muses) 🙂


  • Commit to a daily ritual, one that is both physical and centering (i.e. meditation, breathwork, yoga…I’ve been doing these nervous system Resets that really center the system.). 

  • Journal and/or record your dreams - dreams are a direct portal to Source. Here you can access divine knowing and engage in creative processes. (Side Note - I had a mentor in college that would engage with their dreams for health and wellness tips and resources.). Dream tending in another way to know yourself. 

  • Study and be open to learning something new every day. As we each learn, we impact one another. Together we fall, together we rise. And we do it over and over again. 

  • Practice patience and be compassionate towards yourself while maintaining growth. Depending on your personal history, changing habits and rewiring the brain can take a significant amount of time. 

  • Notice where there is resistance, and go there tenderly. What we hold in the mind expresses itself in the body - slow and steady has helped my process. It’s up to you to discover what works best for your journey. 

  • Engage with and maintain friendships and connections that support your values. As we each practice respect and integrity with our inner realms, our outer experience becomes impeccable. 

  • Make a point of returning to your ‘Why’ every day - It can get easy to get lost in this world. Maintain your steady center. 


What are your personal practices that help you maintain presence and balance?


With Love,


El


P.s. When can we let the fear die?

How about Now





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